He is aware that he is very DIFFERENT
He is aware of judgement and that a lot of people don't get him.
He is aware of the insanity that people function from.
He is aware of something greater possible.
He talks to me about the kind of school he would like to go to where he has choice and where he can create and BE him!
He talks to me about consciousness and what the word would be like if people would wake up and choose it.
He talks to me about how at school he has to follow someone else's point of view of when he can eat, when he can go to the bathroom, when he can move around. This doesn't make sense to him.
"Why cant I just ask my body?" he says to me
He talks about needing to take his shoes home with him at the end of the day because they don't want to be left behind. The rules say he can't and the teacher looks at him as tho he is making such a big deal about nothing. What if it WAS something?
He talks to me about such glorious awarenesses my mind is often blown and new possibilities open for me. Yet he is "just a child" in many people's eyes.
He is often sorting through what people so fiercely project at him as true and what HE knows.
Sometimes in these moments I see the fight, where the insanity of others' realities are louder than his sweet gentle one. He has to fight just to get a sense of himself. Of his joy.
I am SO thankful I have these tools to offer both of my kids as they navigate this world but I cant help but wonder what would the world be like if these extremely aware (sensitive, curious, different) people didn't have to fight just to be here?
Xander tells me of the sadness of the kids in his school and how much he wants to save the day.
How I wish I could save the day for him.
I am aware that this is not good enough
I am aware of future possibilities so far beyond what we currently have. And I have requested them to show up. And I have demanded of me to show up to actualize these possibilities.
Whatever it takes I am creating a future where X-Men don't have to fight just to BE.
And I cant do it alone.